overdue

I am well overdue. Since about Wednesday, I've been feeling the need. I can't really describe the feeling, other than to say I just know it's there. It nags at me, begs me to fill it. I get sassy. I have an attitude about me that is not quite disrespectful, but dangerously close. I need to talk to J about it. I know that, but I keep putting it off. I am afraid of overwhelming him. So far he's done a pretty good job of keeping my spanking need satiated. I don't want to ask too much. Anyway, I've been looking forward to today since Wednesday (Saturday is our scheduled weekly maintenance day). So imagine my disappointment when we get into bed and it hasn't so much as been mentioned once today. I wasn't about to bring it up. Somehow, that ruins it. So, I rolled over and tried to put it out of my mind, although it was all I could think about. He could still remember. He asked what was wrong. I said nothing. He knew I wasn't telling him the truth but he didn't push it. Finally, he said, "I didn't forget your spanking," my hopes rose, ever so slightly. "you're getting it tomorrow," he continued. "I'm really sore today."

I felt like a bomb went off inside me. I just nodded, fighting off the tears that wanted so badly to rush down my face. I don't know why it felt so much worse when he said I wasn't getting it today, but tomorrow. I just need it. Bad. I feel empty now. He's been asleep for almost two hours, and I've just been lying beside him in the dark, unable to sleep. What's the matter with me? I know I'll get it tomorrow but right now, it feels like forever away. I am exhausted, but can't sleep. I need to be spanked :(

Rant over. Hopefully it'll happen sooner in the day rather than later. Our roommate is away for a week so we don't have to worry about him. Hope everyone's weekend is going great!