Sorry about that. I've missed being here, but just havent been able to find the time to log in and read or write. I'm about four and a half weeks away from my due date and I'm panicking a bit about adding a newborn into the mix of chaos that has been my life lately! We're also gearing up to move so things have been pretty hectic. My mother in law broke her leg a few weeks ago and since we're still living in their home that has meant a pretty large adjustment for us (and our little man) as well. To say that I am happy to be moving out is a HUGE understatement! I cant wait to not be sleeping on separate floors from my toddler who is getting his two year molars and may possibly have night terrors, I cant wait to have enough room in my bedroom to put a twin mattress on the floor that he can find santion on in the middle of the night. But mostly I'm relieved to have our own family space again. We definitely need it.
Daddy has been working two jobs, leaving at 8 am, coming home for an hour in between jobs and then returning around 11:30 at night, leaving very little time for us to spend together. The time he does spend at home is occupied by a little boy who REALLY misses his dad, and I'm okay with that. I know they both need it and I'm not going to interfere although there are some days where I feel like stomping my feet and demanding he just hold me in his lap the whole hour he's home. *deep breath* I just have to keep reminding myself that he's bringing in a lot of extra (tax-free) cash and that he's doing it for our family...sometimes its just hard to keep perspective lol.
Anyway, that's my quick little update/ramble. Hope you all are well and are getting (or giving) lots of spankings!! :)
Monday, June 10, 2013
Sunday, April 7, 2013
Pregnant and ... kinky?
I am someone who very much likes to be prepared. I want to know what to expect, what I should do, when I should do it, etc. I don't like the element of surprise very much (unless its a gift)! So, naturally, even though I had looked through some information when I was pregnant with my son, I started browsing the internet again for bdsm safety precautions during pregnancy. As I'd hoped, there was more recent articles and information than when I was pregnant two years ago. One of which I found on EdenFantasys in their SexIs web magazine. You can find the article HERE.
It details for you the things that are safe and not safe during pregnancy. Thank goodness for this girl, spanking is an approved activity, as long as it is delivered to appropriate areas of the body. You shouldn't be laying on your tummy to receive the swats either, which is a bummer for me since other than being otk, laying on my belly is my favorite position to be spanked in. Of course, it is always a good idea to use discretion and during pregnancy more than ever it's important to remember your safe word (and not hesitate to use it should you feel the need).
Most of the not recommended activities are things we don't really do anyway. Electricity play, the violet wand, etc are considered dangerous. The baby is surrounded by a sac of water and adding electricity to water is never a very good idea. This won't affect our play at all, since we don't engage in electricity play to begin with. Other things that are not encouraged include whips, blood play, and breath play. I can understand the first two, since the tails of a whip are tricky to control, it would be very easy to strike a pregnant sub somewhere the Dom did not intend, and accidentally cause damage. Blood play is dangerous because the increase in blood volume during pregnancy can make you bleed more than normal, and make it more difficult for your blood to clot. Blood play is definitely a hard limit of mine so no skin off my back there, and we don't mess around with whips either. The breath play is something I'm doing a little interpreting of my own with, however. The article explains that restricting the oxygen flow to the woman means also restricting the oxygen to the fetus. Which completely makes sense. However when Daddy puts his hands around my throat, he doesn't often cut off my oxygen supply. His grip is firm and is enough to make my panties wet, but doesn't actually restrict me from breathing. I feel that this is probably still safe for us to continue since there is no actual deprivation of oxygen. A few other things that are not recommended are tight bondage, suspension, and restrictive clothing such as latex and rubber. For those very heavy into bdsm and that take part in many of these activities, this might seem like a daunting list of do-not's. Don't worry, it will be well worth waiting until after delivering (and recovering!) to resume these things. Not to mention, there's a bunch of other ways to keep your dynamic alive while you wait!
Like I mentioned before, spanking and paddling are approved. Just be cautious and listen to your body. Use your safeword if you need to. During pregnancy the woman's body changes immensely and you might be able to take a lot less pain than you can otherwise. That is definitely true in my case! I am such a wimp when I'm pregnant! So, don't try to push through just because you normally can take more. If you're in distress, your baby can feel it, and it can cause distress for them too! Orgasm control is a great way for your Dom to assert his power over you. This is something we have only played minutely with, but I want more! More, more, more! (I'm a needy preggo girl hehe). Mild pet play, foot worship, and cum shots are some other fun things you can still engage in while pregnant. Nuzzling up to Daddy or curling up in his lap like a kitty sounds particularly nice when I'm not feeling well or am exhausted from chasing the little guy around all day. I don't do feet, but for those who do, or might, pregnancy is the perfect time to do so! Since I'm pregnant and it doesn't really matter if he, ya know ... cums inside .. he usually does just that. It's enjoyable for both of us. However, in the past, when we weren't trying to get pregnant, he has pulled on and finished on various parts of my body. This is slightly humiliating, and definitely makes me feel super submissive .. not to mention aroused!
Another thing not mentioned in the article, that you can still participate in while pregnant is mild anal play. I have seen warnings not to go from the anus to the vagina as you're more susceptible to infection when pregnant, but as long as you follow the basic health guidelines associated with anal I don't see why you couldn't do that while pregnant! Plugs can be especially fun and can be used by your Dom as a way to dominate you! Pregnancy wouldn't be a bad time to check out some new sex toys and experiment. Unless you've been put on pelvic rest, trying out a new dildo or vibrator could be a great way to put your pregnancy libido to use! I, for one, become insatiable when pregnant! Thank goodness Daddy got me a nice new toy for Christmas ;)
Of course, the most important thing to remember when playing with a pregnant woman is to listen to and trust her body. There is no such thing as being too cautious, so if she feels any discomfort or "off" in any way, all play should cease. Enjoy this time!
It details for you the things that are safe and not safe during pregnancy. Thank goodness for this girl, spanking is an approved activity, as long as it is delivered to appropriate areas of the body. You shouldn't be laying on your tummy to receive the swats either, which is a bummer for me since other than being otk, laying on my belly is my favorite position to be spanked in. Of course, it is always a good idea to use discretion and during pregnancy more than ever it's important to remember your safe word (and not hesitate to use it should you feel the need).
Most of the not recommended activities are things we don't really do anyway. Electricity play, the violet wand, etc are considered dangerous. The baby is surrounded by a sac of water and adding electricity to water is never a very good idea. This won't affect our play at all, since we don't engage in electricity play to begin with. Other things that are not encouraged include whips, blood play, and breath play. I can understand the first two, since the tails of a whip are tricky to control, it would be very easy to strike a pregnant sub somewhere the Dom did not intend, and accidentally cause damage. Blood play is dangerous because the increase in blood volume during pregnancy can make you bleed more than normal, and make it more difficult for your blood to clot. Blood play is definitely a hard limit of mine so no skin off my back there, and we don't mess around with whips either. The breath play is something I'm doing a little interpreting of my own with, however. The article explains that restricting the oxygen flow to the woman means also restricting the oxygen to the fetus. Which completely makes sense. However when Daddy puts his hands around my throat, he doesn't often cut off my oxygen supply. His grip is firm and is enough to make my panties wet, but doesn't actually restrict me from breathing. I feel that this is probably still safe for us to continue since there is no actual deprivation of oxygen. A few other things that are not recommended are tight bondage, suspension, and restrictive clothing such as latex and rubber. For those very heavy into bdsm and that take part in many of these activities, this might seem like a daunting list of do-not's. Don't worry, it will be well worth waiting until after delivering (and recovering!) to resume these things. Not to mention, there's a bunch of other ways to keep your dynamic alive while you wait!
Like I mentioned before, spanking and paddling are approved. Just be cautious and listen to your body. Use your safeword if you need to. During pregnancy the woman's body changes immensely and you might be able to take a lot less pain than you can otherwise. That is definitely true in my case! I am such a wimp when I'm pregnant! So, don't try to push through just because you normally can take more. If you're in distress, your baby can feel it, and it can cause distress for them too! Orgasm control is a great way for your Dom to assert his power over you. This is something we have only played minutely with, but I want more! More, more, more! (I'm a needy preggo girl hehe). Mild pet play, foot worship, and cum shots are some other fun things you can still engage in while pregnant. Nuzzling up to Daddy or curling up in his lap like a kitty sounds particularly nice when I'm not feeling well or am exhausted from chasing the little guy around all day. I don't do feet, but for those who do, or might, pregnancy is the perfect time to do so! Since I'm pregnant and it doesn't really matter if he, ya know ... cums inside .. he usually does just that. It's enjoyable for both of us. However, in the past, when we weren't trying to get pregnant, he has pulled on and finished on various parts of my body. This is slightly humiliating, and definitely makes me feel super submissive .. not to mention aroused!
Another thing not mentioned in the article, that you can still participate in while pregnant is mild anal play. I have seen warnings not to go from the anus to the vagina as you're more susceptible to infection when pregnant, but as long as you follow the basic health guidelines associated with anal I don't see why you couldn't do that while pregnant! Plugs can be especially fun and can be used by your Dom as a way to dominate you! Pregnancy wouldn't be a bad time to check out some new sex toys and experiment. Unless you've been put on pelvic rest, trying out a new dildo or vibrator could be a great way to put your pregnancy libido to use! I, for one, become insatiable when pregnant! Thank goodness Daddy got me a nice new toy for Christmas ;)
Of course, the most important thing to remember when playing with a pregnant woman is to listen to and trust her body. There is no such thing as being too cautious, so if she feels any discomfort or "off" in any way, all play should cease. Enjoy this time!
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Masochist?
masochism (ˈmæsəˌkɪzəm) ![[Click for IPA pronunciation guide]](http://static.sfdict.com/dictstatic/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif) | |
| — n | |
| 1. | psychiatry an abnormal condition in which pleasure, esp sexual pleasure, is derived from pain or from humiliation, domination, etc,by another person |
| 2. | psychoanal the directing towards oneself of any destructivetendencies |
| 3. | Compare sadism a tendency to take pleasure from one's own suffering
That is the definition of masochism according to dictionary.com. I have wondered for some time now if I am a masochist. While I have a spanking kink, and enjoy being submissive, I get zero sexual pleasure from the pain. During a spanking I'm getting pleasure from the power exchange itself, and from knowing that I'm submitting to something that's not entirely pleasant. Afterwards, I am always wet. I like for Daddy to "hurt" me, but I don't like the pain. I like to know I'm taking the pain from him, and that he's using his power and control to "hurt/torture" me ... but the actual pain itself is not a turn on. I still squeal and screech and cry out and hope for it to end. But when it does end, I'm pleased. I love being helpless to him and being made to do things I don't really like.
I'm curious where the rest of you all stand on this. Would you say I'm a masochist? Do you feel the same as me? Differently? Would you consider yourself a masochist or maybe even a sadist?
|
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
busy times, but I'm still here!
Wow, I've been really awful at making time for my blog lately. Sorry about that everyone! We had a slew of birthdays, then holiday plans and throw in a few other big life changes and we've been too busy to stop and think! There was a fire in our apartment building on thanksgiving and though the only damage we suffered was from our door being kicked in by the fire dept, it took our landlord a FULL MONTH to replace the door. Which ended up being an entire month that we were unable to even lock one of the doors to our apartment. We had to wedge something under it to even keep it closed. Our landlady was fined for a few things in the building that were not up to code and she didn't fix those either so we finally decided enough was enough and moved out. We are staying with Daddy's parents temporarily until we find a place that is a good fit for us. In the meantime we will be able to save up some money as well. Although we had looked at a few places, we both felt like none of them were exactly what we wanted and we decided not to rush into another place and wait to find the right one. Which is extra important now that we are expecting another little one! I'm only about 12 and a half weeks along right now so we figured take our time and find somewhere that we can see ourselves living for at least the next few years.
Given all that we've been going through and doing the past couple months, I was always fearful that ttwd was going to fall to the back burner as it has in the past. It didn't, though. We had some patches where it wasn't in the forefront of either of our minds (all day morning sickness, anyone?? Talk about not being in the mood...) but we have managed to keep things running rather smoothly.
I haven't had much time to read blogs lately, so it will probably take me some time to catch up on everything that's been going on! Hope everyone's holidays went well!
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